Top 10 Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than Religion
10. No one will kill you for not drinking Beer.
9. Beer doesn’t tell you how to have sex.
8. Beer has never caused a major war.
7. They don’t force Beer on minors who can’t think for themselves.
6. When you have Beer, you don’t knock on people’s doors trying to
make them drink it.
5. Nobody’s ever been burned at the stake, hanged, or tortured over
their brand of Beer.
4. You don’t have to wait more than 2,000 years for a second Beer.
3. There are laws saying that Beer labels can’t lie to you.
2. If you’ve devoted your life to Beer, there are groups to help you stop.
1. You can prove you have a Beer.
Doofus Hipsters Must Die
You've seen them everywhere, they are a plague on our society and it's time the rest of us went about eradicating each and every one of them. They like to hang out in urban neighborhoods, usually near the coffee shop or record store. They tend to mingle in packs, an equal mix of girls and boys. Those of age like to drink PBR, not because it's good beer, it isn't, but because it's so ironic. Their cigarette of choice is anything made by Camel and it's the only thing they ever seem to have money for.
The boys are fond of shaggy beards, trucker hats, tee shirts that are three sizes too small, skinny jeans (no one looks good in skinny jeans), canvass shoes that are generally held together with duct tape. The only thing of value is generally an iPod. No doubt there is nothing but shitty music on said iPod.
The girls like to wear much the same, usually complemented with a scarf and wool hat, no matter the season or the temperature. They are skinny beyond belief and so in need of an all you can eat buffet. They live on coffee and cigarettes and are often much more insufferable than the guys they like to hang out with.
Most of them live at home in the suburbs but like to hang in the city, either riding in on the bus or catching a ride with the rare hipster who owns a car. They contribute nothing to society. They do not buy anything at the stores they like to hang out at, preferring to just watch the traffic go by, make snide comments at those better dressed and from time to time, take a ride on a too old skateboard.
I say no more. This plague must be stopped and stopped now. When you see these hipsters on the street, let them know how stupid they look. By all means, make fun of them, laugh at them and make them get off your property. Tell them to go back to the suburbs where they live, we don't want your kind down here. Whatever you do, don't imitate them and certainly don't become one of them. Treat them with the disgust that they so deserve.
The boys are fond of shaggy beards, trucker hats, tee shirts that are three sizes too small, skinny jeans (no one looks good in skinny jeans), canvass shoes that are generally held together with duct tape. The only thing of value is generally an iPod. No doubt there is nothing but shitty music on said iPod.
The girls like to wear much the same, usually complemented with a scarf and wool hat, no matter the season or the temperature. They are skinny beyond belief and so in need of an all you can eat buffet. They live on coffee and cigarettes and are often much more insufferable than the guys they like to hang out with.
Most of them live at home in the suburbs but like to hang in the city, either riding in on the bus or catching a ride with the rare hipster who owns a car. They contribute nothing to society. They do not buy anything at the stores they like to hang out at, preferring to just watch the traffic go by, make snide comments at those better dressed and from time to time, take a ride on a too old skateboard.
I say no more. This plague must be stopped and stopped now. When you see these hipsters on the street, let them know how stupid they look. By all means, make fun of them, laugh at them and make them get off your property. Tell them to go back to the suburbs where they live, we don't want your kind down here. Whatever you do, don't imitate them and certainly don't become one of them. Treat them with the disgust that they so deserve.
Bloodbath
Well that was ugly. I suppose I can take solace in the fact that the Dems did manage to keep hold of the Senate. That will come in handy when the Republicans begin impeachment charges against Obama next year. Speaking of Obama, I saw a few clips of his presser today and I have to say, he just doesn't get it. Seriously, does he think that they are going to meet him halfway? Really? If they weren't going to negotiate in good faith when they were way in the minority, why would they now?
Regardless, it was just a miserable night from coast to coast. Here in Kentucky, my fellow citizens saw fit to elect a certified nutcase to the US Senate. Across the river in Indiana, they doubled down on Dan Coats and pretty much made it clear that going for Obama in 2008 was an outlier. Not to be outdone, the citizens of Wisconsin, a state I used to hold in pretty high regard, decided that one of the two or three best Senators in the nation deserved to be fired. Bang head against wall now.
Locally, it was still a pretty good night for those of us here in Louisville. Our Congressman, the awesome John Yarmuth, was easily re-elected and Democrat Greg Fischer is our new mayor. Jefferson County also voted for Jack Conway in his ill fated Senate campaign so at least the stupid hasn't penetrated the Gene Snyder Freeway.
Let's have a few days to mope around and feel bad about ourselves and then lets roll our sleeves back up and get to work taking back the House and keeping the White House in 2012. I can dream, can't I?
Regardless, it was just a miserable night from coast to coast. Here in Kentucky, my fellow citizens saw fit to elect a certified nutcase to the US Senate. Across the river in Indiana, they doubled down on Dan Coats and pretty much made it clear that going for Obama in 2008 was an outlier. Not to be outdone, the citizens of Wisconsin, a state I used to hold in pretty high regard, decided that one of the two or three best Senators in the nation deserved to be fired. Bang head against wall now.
Locally, it was still a pretty good night for those of us here in Louisville. Our Congressman, the awesome John Yarmuth, was easily re-elected and Democrat Greg Fischer is our new mayor. Jefferson County also voted for Jack Conway in his ill fated Senate campaign so at least the stupid hasn't penetrated the Gene Snyder Freeway.
Let's have a few days to mope around and feel bad about ourselves and then lets roll our sleeves back up and get to work taking back the House and keeping the White House in 2012. I can dream, can't I?
Take Me Home...
I'll be heading to my beloved West Virginia this week and while this would normally bring joy to my heart, this particular trip will be filled with sadness and grief. A dear friend of mine, Margret Ann Smith, passed away today after a battle with cancer. Mags was the chef and owner of The Red Fox, the amazing restaurant I was blessed to work at for several years during the 90's. An amazing woman, Mags always made us feel so welcome and appreciated.
She watched over us all and during the Christmas season, when so many of us were far away from our families, she went out of her way to make us all feel like family. It's been over a decade since I lived there but not a day goes by that I don't think about those beautiful mountains and the place I love so much. I got to see her last October, a little over a year ago, and spent a lovely evening having dinner with her. As always, it was like I had never been away.
I will see many people that I have not seen in years and while it will be great to be with them, I just wish it were under different circumstances. I suspect that there will be a very large turnout this week as she had a large family in Elkins and loved ones all around the east coast. Most of the people I worked with have moved on to other places but I'm sure they will all find their way back to the mountains this week as we say goodbye to a dear friend. We love you Mags!
This is for you kiddo...
She watched over us all and during the Christmas season, when so many of us were far away from our families, she went out of her way to make us all feel like family. It's been over a decade since I lived there but not a day goes by that I don't think about those beautiful mountains and the place I love so much. I got to see her last October, a little over a year ago, and spent a lovely evening having dinner with her. As always, it was like I had never been away.
I will see many people that I have not seen in years and while it will be great to be with them, I just wish it were under different circumstances. I suspect that there will be a very large turnout this week as she had a large family in Elkins and loved ones all around the east coast. Most of the people I worked with have moved on to other places but I'm sure they will all find their way back to the mountains this week as we say goodbye to a dear friend. We love you Mags!
This is for you kiddo...
I Call Bullshit On This One
I love Salon, it's one of the best sites on the internet, but I have to call bullshit on http://www.salon.com/life/broadsheet/2010/10/13/trans_athletes/index.html. Citing a study, Salon says that...
It's possible I suppose that this is true but I find it very difficult to believe. I've been on hormones for over six years now, take massive dosages of anti-androgens and even though I've lost some muscle mass, I feel pretty confident that there are few women, save for elite athletes, that I couldn't out compete in just about any sport.
I can guarantee you that there is not one single female that I work with, many of whom are much younger and if truth be told, in much better shape than me, that could beat me in basketball, throw a football further, ski better, hit a baseball better, run faster, jump higher or lift more than I can. Not a one. Zip. Zilch. Zero.
I'm not saying this to brag or for any other reason save for the fact that I have the advantage of a body that was built by more than 30 years of testosterone. My skeletal system is bigger and stronger and all those years of living "male" simply conditioned me to be able to do those things. It's the way the human body is built and it's the way that most of our fellow animals are built. In nearly every single instance, the male of a species is bigger, stronger and faster. No amount of estrogen will change that.
I give you as an example my two border collies. Sammy and River are both the same age, separated by only a few months, but Sammy, my male border, is bigger, faster, more agile and a better athlete. He's not necessarily smarter, though he is a genius, but physically, he is built different and it's the same with me.
Okay, feel free to disagree but I stand by what I've said here.
It turns out, though, that there is no proof that transgender women have an automatic advantage. A report released earlier this month on transgender student athletes says...
It's possible I suppose that this is true but I find it very difficult to believe. I've been on hormones for over six years now, take massive dosages of anti-androgens and even though I've lost some muscle mass, I feel pretty confident that there are few women, save for elite athletes, that I couldn't out compete in just about any sport.
I can guarantee you that there is not one single female that I work with, many of whom are much younger and if truth be told, in much better shape than me, that could beat me in basketball, throw a football further, ski better, hit a baseball better, run faster, jump higher or lift more than I can. Not a one. Zip. Zilch. Zero.
I'm not saying this to brag or for any other reason save for the fact that I have the advantage of a body that was built by more than 30 years of testosterone. My skeletal system is bigger and stronger and all those years of living "male" simply conditioned me to be able to do those things. It's the way the human body is built and it's the way that most of our fellow animals are built. In nearly every single instance, the male of a species is bigger, stronger and faster. No amount of estrogen will change that.
I give you as an example my two border collies. Sammy and River are both the same age, separated by only a few months, but Sammy, my male border, is bigger, faster, more agile and a better athlete. He's not necessarily smarter, though he is a genius, but physically, he is built different and it's the same with me.
Okay, feel free to disagree but I stand by what I've said here.
Celebrate Good Times
Today is Native American Genocide Day, also known as Columbus Day. It's pretty much just one more day set aside for white people. In all seriousness though, it didn't have to happen that way.
Cold
It's hard to believe that it was 99 degrees just a little over a week ago. A Frost Advisory has been issued for all of the counties west and south of Louisville. The urban heat island in the city will keep us well above freezing tonight so no frost at my house. I can't remember the last year we had cold temperatures like this, so early in the year. Last year, we didn't get our first freeze of the year till the first week of December.
Great Big Sea
I am so freaking excited about the last Waterfront Wednesday of the summer. On September 29th, WFPK is bringing Great Big Sea to town for a free concert at Waterfront Park. This trio hales from St. John's Newfoundland and are known for putting on a rollicking great show. That it's free is just a bonus.
Here's a taste of some Great Big Sea fun...
Here's a taste of some Great Big Sea fun...
It's Got What Plants Need
It's been a long time since I've seen things as dry as they are right now. It hasn't rained her in at least a month and for the two months before that, we really hadn't had more than a stray thunderstorm here or there. The green long ago left the grass, plants have wilted and died, trees are in total shock and are just dropping their leaves without ever changing colors. The ground, well, it,s about as hard and cracked open as you can get.
I've spent a small fortune watering this summer, just to keep things somehow going. I've invested way too much money in turning my yard into a natural setting, buying native species from expensive nurseries, planting numerous shade trees and generally trying to make my little space wildlife friendly, to watch it all just die. So, I have one of the few living spaces left on my street and with no rain in the forecast, coupled with daytime temps in the 90's, things are only going to get worse.
If there is one silver lining, it's where I live. On the south banks of the Ohio River, water restrictions are unheard of around here. We get all of our city water from the big river and while the water level is down a little bit (sufficient rain upstream), it's no big deal. So, I have a reliable and cheap source of water and I'm using it to keep my trees and plants alive.
So, if you have any rain in your parts, please send it our way. It is, Brawndo withstanding, what plants crave.
I've spent a small fortune watering this summer, just to keep things somehow going. I've invested way too much money in turning my yard into a natural setting, buying native species from expensive nurseries, planting numerous shade trees and generally trying to make my little space wildlife friendly, to watch it all just die. So, I have one of the few living spaces left on my street and with no rain in the forecast, coupled with daytime temps in the 90's, things are only going to get worse.
If there is one silver lining, it's where I live. On the south banks of the Ohio River, water restrictions are unheard of around here. We get all of our city water from the big river and while the water level is down a little bit (sufficient rain upstream), it's no big deal. So, I have a reliable and cheap source of water and I'm using it to keep my trees and plants alive.
So, if you have any rain in your parts, please send it our way. It is, Brawndo withstanding, what plants crave.
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