What's Next, A Beatdown?

The only thing that hasn't happened is getting the shit beat out of me by someone who finds my existence not just repulsive, but nauseating as well. Sometimes, when the public mocking becomes so bad, I would almost prefer physical abuse, as at least those bruises heal. These now common episodes have sucked the life out of me and sapped my soul. Some days, I just feel like an emotionless being walking aimlessly through life. For the time being, the tears still flow, but once the ability to feel pain stops, they too will one day stop. How I'm still going is beyond me and speaks to the utter desperation of my inner feelings. Still, one can only run into a brick wall so many times before deciding that maybe this isn't the best route.