Porn

I used to joke around that I knew my estrogen was working because I could get a lot more done on the computer. It's true what they say, men think about sex 24/7/365. I still think about sex a lot, but it doesn't occupy every waking thought that enters my brain. My sex drive is a fraction of what it used to bebut that doesn't mean that I wouldn't love to get it on from time to time. I'll be honest, I love sex, the kinkier the better and nothing would rock my world like a night of depraved, do anything sex. But it isn't going to happen, at least as long as I have my current equipment.

Anyways, I was browsing through the liberal blogosphere this evening when I came across an interesting article about feminism and porn, can they coexist? Personally, I don't see why not. We are all sexual beings, most of us anyways, and wathcing other people get off is often a great way to get off ourselves. There are a lot of women who love to watch porn and I say good for them. That's not to say I find all porn a good thing. There are a lot of porn genres that are simply disgusting and clearly degrading to women and men alike. I have zero desire to watch a woman's head be shoved into a toilet, choked around the neck or degraded in any other demeaning manner.

Still, I do like some of the edgier stuff out there and not ashamed to admit it. I'm a huge fan of Tristan Taormino of Pucker UP fame. How can you not like a woman whose motto is Smart-Sexy-Anal-Kinky-Fun? Tristan is an award winning writer, sex educator and Phi Beta Kappa. Her column, Pucker UP appears in the Village Voice and is syndicated nationwide. She's as much a feminist as anyone but she's not shy about getting off and her best know book is The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex. Yummy!

So what makes some porn acceptable and other not? First, women need to have some control over it's making and second, women need to actually be enjoying what is going on. There is a lot of porn that fits that bill and yes, some of it is quite dirty and oh so naughty. This is perhaps the best defenition I've seen:

Feminist porn: Porn which does not portray, promote, or utilize stereotypical gender constructs, expolitative gaze, or highly unnatural, stereotypical appearence standards. Also, the porn would be produced by a company dedicated to equality in all levels of production, promotion, and distribution.

Sex is nothing to be ashamed of and it's time we admit to ourselves that yes, porn can be a good thing. Americans are incredibly repressed when it comes to sex and I'm not sure why. Most people are doing it and doing it frequently. A lot of it must be good, my own personal experience shows me that more than a few women are more than happy to be depraved and slutty in bed, me included.

For an example of porn that is good, check out the site Good For Her.